Last night I decided to make bread pudding for dessert – as I was cracking the eggs my youngest said : “Mom, how did you get so good at breaking eggs- how do you break them so perfectly”
I looked at him and said: “Practice”
Then I thought about how often it was as I was growing up that I’d want to try something and might not be able to. How often we were broke or without money – and how everything we had was very…scarce. In our home – there wasn’t much time or space for mistakes or accidents. When you only have a dozen eggs and no money for more – you can’t afford to waste them on childish inquiry and curiosity.
If you grew up poor you may know this feeling.
The bad thing about this is it sets up a belief in your energetic memory that says “You can’t afford to make mistakes, they cost too much.”
This belief keeps you from trying new things. Taking risks. Breaking eggs. Making messes.
It had for years kept me in a state of angst and turmoil. Always worried and concerned. And so it seemed that the Universe gave me things to be worried about. At some point I decided I wanted to see what it was about me that created this expression. Where were those ideas housed and how was I attracting them towards me.
I realized –
In order to get out of a cycle of lack – you have to be willing to make mistakes.
There is no other way. This is how we learn – from our screw ups, mess ups, and imperfect actions. When we are in a state of lack we deny ourselves those opportunities for fear that we will not have enough when we need it.
Fear of being without makes us not take chances, explore, expand. Conversely – messing up, getting shells in our eggs, bleaching the clothes on occasion and making an utter fool of ourselves is a means by which abundance is expressed. We recognize that if we mess up a bit it’s okay. That life will provide us with another opportunity to try yet again. And because we live in such a punishment based world many might think – well what’s the difference between good mess ups and “bad” mess ups with penalty or karmic bad-stuff. One thing that shows the difference is a word you hear Richard and I use a great deal around here.
When we mess up following our passion. When we follow our Love – while the outcome may not be a desired one – we will always be made more because of it.
When we mess up following our fear and neglect – we often end up feeling regret.
Our relationships are a good place to apply the mess up principle:
When we’re in a lack mentality we begin to view anything that happens with our Love’s as being a deal breaker, indicative of something major, the tip of the iceberg. Our vibration of lack creates all sorts of limiting beliefs that that constrict the dynamic and make it dry, analytical…. empty.
When we’re in an Abundance mentality we understand that just because he forgot to take out the trash doesn’t mean our relationship sucks. Just because we didn’t have a mind-blowing orgasm doesn’t make our sex life dead. Just because he says that some super-model is hot doesn’t mean you’re not. Abundance shifts things. It expands your possibilities. It makes imperfections in relationships mere character builders, not destructive tendencies.
Today Darling, insert a bit more mess into your life. Allow some mistakes. Allow the abundance to flow through your f-ups!
Living. Loving. Lushly,