Lessons in Alchemic Relationships…
If you feel that you are lacking closeness in your relationship it is always YOU who needs to shift if you want that to shift. If you feel a lack of communication in your relationship it is you that needs to shift if you desire that to shift.
Sit with that and feel the inner resistance as it arises. Notice how much and how quickly you decide that the other needs to change something.
Re-read the sentence
It is absolutely your responsibility to shift YOU.
The other person may not feel a lack of closeness with you.
Typically that person is then demonized as being “unconscious” or “emotionally unavailable” or “lacking depth” when in reality… perhaps they feel very close to you.
Perhaps they are content and satisfied.
Perhaps that is a trait they are here to teach you, my love.
The question then is WHAT do you need to shift.
If you feel a lack of communication… it is likely because your beloved doesn’t communicate like you and you believe that the SHOULD. Ladies, men communicate non-verbally constantly. And believe it or not, they don’t understand your plethora of words nor do they receive that as love…. any more than you understand and correctly interpret their nonverbal communication.
Typically men will accept the difference UNTIL you begin to complain and devalue him and his communication then he’ll begin to judge it.
The easiest thing is to simply say to yourself – I’m not happy with the communication – let me listen more and talk less. Let me observe more with curiosity and analyze less. I’m not happy with our closeness – let me love more and judge less. Let me feel him more and attempt to change him less.