From warrior to love….
I used to consider myself a warrior…
Always fighting for the underdog
I was raised by an activist, a woman who fought and marched and boycotted and more.
Fighting against…xyz was in my blood.
And because of my tendency to see very easily inequity and unfairness it was my nature to fight against it at every turn.
As I grew, I shifted… Because of a few humbling and eye-opening changes in belief
1. I don’t innately know what’s right, I only know what I want. Sometimes we can confuse the two and making my own desires the “right” way and anything else wrong presumes much. Even if it’s my desires for others. I’m not omniscient, I only know in part.
2. Seeing people as being in need of my salvation denies them power. This was huge. everyone is powerful. Everyone has the ability to choose how, when and where they use their power. Sometimes trying to save others may make me feel good, but it just denies them growth opportunities where they find their own strength.
3. It’s not about me and it is all about me. When I slowed down and turned all of that external energy inward I realized that… I was not focusing on the one person I could truly save… me. That focusing externally was what I was taught to be a good person, but really it was moving me away from personal power and sovereignty and causing me to actually deny that in others. Having a form of power and denying the power thereof, literally…
4. There are multiple sides to everything and peace is not accomplished by war. At some point I began to understand that contrary to my Religious upbringing, there are multiple ways to see something and it’s not always as simple as it seems. That judging people and experiences just made them my enemy. And that no matter how much I fought I could not find peace. That part was a big deal, because deep down inside that’s what I craved, peace.
5. Love is not weak, love is powerful. I used to feel we’d fight and fight and fight and vanquish the bad guys, bad things bad ideas etc; and THEN love could exist. As if love was this weak thing that required my fighting against everything so it could exist. Then I had a revelation. Love is powerful. It IS POWER. Love doesn’t need me to champion for it, it requires me to be it and by such being everything that is not is transmuted into it. It’s a highly potent contagion, with a 100% infection rate.
This was a just a bit of how I went from being a warrior to love. It’s been a fascinating journey… And it continues.
This is how I ended up realizing that LOVE was what I was called to be.